Grown Ass Consumption of Adult Beverages

As a grown ass man, I can speak with authority that Grown Ass Men love a good drink. Much like our fathers before us, and their fathers before them, Grown ass men throughout history have been imbibing of spirits for various occasions. The joy of partaking in the festivities of drinking is the broad spectrum of social and personal events that enable one to enjoy their favorite beverage.

Think back amongst yourselves; was it at a wedding, house party, or just at 2 am after breaking in to your old man's liquor cabinet that you first had your taste of your favorite nectar? Personally, I remember my first Scotch in the same way that I hope to remember my first child; A delightful, beautiful moment in retrospect, while at the time possibly a bit messy… It's all right, Grown Ass Men are honest and forthcoming… It may not have been a great experience, but It sure was not a deterrent either. So into the wild valley of Adult Beverages I journeyed, as many have before.

Grown ass men and Adult Beverages go together like biscuits and gravy. With that said, a grown ass man knows how to handle himself around the drink. As a man who works with youth on a pretty constant basis, I fear future generation of men will be deceived into thinking that The Situation is a solid example of proper drinking habit. This fear has been realized by an individual near to my heart; my brother-in-law.

Durring a recent correspondence, I was made aware of his recent escapades involving a bottle of UV Blue, His roommates nose and cell phone, and 2 of those things being broken.(Hint, it was not the bottle) I know that we've all been in similar situations personally, Mine involved 2 bottles of Boones Farm and a Handle of Skol Vodka and ended with projectile vomiting in my then Girl Friends Dorm. Now maybe it's just the over protective brother-in-law in me, or maybe its my deep desire to not watch people follow mistakes I've made, But really, I fear these things are becoming more and more socially acceptable.

I fear that gone are the days of being a social outcast for filling your room mate's shoes with gently used Rum and Dominos Pizza, instead society is praising these types of non-grown ass man drinking experiences.

At some point, Adult Males everywhere need to learn how and when it is appropriate to drink. With that in mind I propose a solid list of times to scale back and also times to let it rip:

1)Work Event? Unless your boss is your best friend, drinking in excess around him is out of the question.
-Grown Ass Man Suggestion: Order a Scotch neat and chat him up about how to increase company productivity

2) Weekend Camping Trip? Grab the cooler and fill'er up!
-Grown Ass Man Suggestion: Remember the first beer you snatched from your old man? Yeah grab some ice and a case of Stroh's and enjoy some solid time in nature. (Just remember, Grown Ass Men respect their surroundings so clean up the empties.)

3)Are you around your significant other's parents/ family? Lock it up.
-Grown Ass Man Suggestion: Bring a 6 Pack of Solid Locally Brewed Beer to share… the key here is the sharing, don't drink 5 of them and hand out 1.

4)Is it March 17th? If so, belly up.
-Grown Ass Man Suggestion: Stroll on down to your favorite public house and have the barkeep pull a pint of your favorite stout or ale. Just don't be the guy drinking green beer, Remember, You're a grown ass man.

5)Out on the town with a special lady? Unless she enjoys carrying you home on her back, scale it down champ.
-Grown Ass Man Suggestion: Nice Dinner and a Bottle of Shiraz.

6)Weekend Bachelor Party with the guys? Let Loose.
-Grown Ass Man Suggestion:Celebrate! Grab a Grown Ass Bottle of Red Breast and nurse it like mothers milk for 48-72 hours.

There is a time and place for the grown ass man to drink and drink hard, but those are few and far between. As grown ass men, we leave week long benders and binge drinking to the boys.

As the Apostle Paul once wrote:

When I was a child, I spoke like a child, I understood like a child, I reasoned like a child; but when I became a man, I put away childish things.

Solid advice from a historic grown ass man.

Hit us up with a comment of suggested Scale it Backs or Let it Rips.