G.A.M. of the Week
This guy is amazing. At everything.
Thursday, March 31, 2011
Circumstances Under Which to Assert Your Grown Ass Manhood
1. When the woman in your life tells you not to have another helping of whatever.
2. When someone asks you why you just did that thing you just did.
3. A mirror.
4. When the frequency of your showering is called into question.
5. Right before you buy or adopt a tiny dog.
6. When someone asks you if you need a hand. Even if you need a hand.
7. To justify the ridiculous challenges to which you commit with other Grown Ass Men.
8. When you blow a stop sign.
9. When you want the whole side of the booth to yourself.
10. When you haven't eaten a green vegetable in a week.
2. When someone asks you why you just did that thing you just did.
3. A mirror.
4. When the frequency of your showering is called into question.
5. Right before you buy or adopt a tiny dog.
6. When someone asks you if you need a hand. Even if you need a hand.
7. To justify the ridiculous challenges to which you commit with other Grown Ass Men.
8. When you blow a stop sign.
9. When you want the whole side of the booth to yourself.
10. When you haven't eaten a green vegetable in a week.
Things That Define a Grown Ass Man
First things first, welcome to the grown ass blog where grown ass men have some grown ass talk about grown ass issues. You may be asking yourself, "what is a grown ass man?" Well, I'm glad you asked because I am here to answer that question. A grown ass man is defined by what he does and says. For instance, if a grown ass man is tired he does not say, "oh boy am I tired, I'm gonna hit the hay," rather he says, "I think I'm gonna go pass out." Or how about instead of, "wow I'm hungry we should order a pizza," rather he says "I'm starving, I'm ordering that 5-5-5 deal from Dominos. That should be enough right?"
Here is a list of a few things that could define a grown ass man:
he eats meat at every meal
he eats one more plate then his stomach can handle
he has seen at least two Rocky movies
he loves to eat food that he will regret eating later
he doesn't spend more that 10 minutes getting ready in the morning
he knows his state capitals
he has at least a theory on how to fix everything that has ever been broken
he has made at least one thing with his own hands
he has a cool scar or cut to show off
he takes his coffee black
he has entered at least one eating contest in his life
he has at least two different crazy ideas that would make a normal woman leave him
he has ever sweat from his face because of his food
These, among many others, define what a grown ass man is (and hopefully who you as the reader are)
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